Tuesday, February 26, 2008

Birthing ideas

My mind is constantly teeming with film and story ideas and I usually talk myself out of them. But last night, I had a really good one and the whole process of it is still fresh in my mind so I thought I'd share.

At about 3:15 a.m. Igby got out of bed (he and I sleep together while the girls sleep in the other room. Shut up.) and woke me up for a second. I tried to go back to sleep but had to take a leak so I got up and did. When I came back in the room, Igby was doing the thing he does where he stands at the foot of the bed and pretends he can't jump back in the bed. So I picked him up and as I did SNAP!!! Something totally gave out in my right shoulder. There was a popping sound like when you bend a chicken leg and snap it. I had a car accident about 3 years ago and since then, my shoulder has always been wonky. I can usually stretch it out or go throw a football around and it makes it feel better. But since the arrival of the baby and way, way too much guitar hero and wii playing, my shoulder has felt on the verge of a breakdown for some time now...and I think that this morning at 3:30 a.m. I f-ed it up pretty good.

I didn't scream or cry (even though I wanted to) and I just kind of rolled back into bed with tears streaming from my eyes. I found a comfortable spot and just laid there, hoping it would stop hurting. It was then I let my mind wander off...trying to think of something else to distract me. Then, my idea hit me and it hit me hard. I don't want to say specifically what the idea was as I don't want to tip my hand and also, if I talk about it, it usually keeps me from DOING it. I will say, it's an idea for a feature documentary that could really have an audience.

So as I lay there, my mind was going a mile a minute and I knew I would never get back to sleep. That happens alot. I get an idea when I should be sleeping and I chew it over in my mind then fall back asleep, wake up and think it was a dumb idea. But this time, the idea wouldn't quit. It kind of reminded me of when you're sick with the flu or food poisoning. Like "I don't want to get up and use the bathroom but I know if I do, it'll help me feel better." So at 3:45, I got up and jotted down a huge list of ideas that were flying out of me. I finally hit a wall and went back to bed.

Still unable to sleep, still cringing because of my shoulder....more ideas started flowing. And flowing. And flowing. It was what I will now refer to as "idearrea." I had to get up again and write more down. Then back to bed, then up again 15 minutes later until finally, I somehow dozed off at about 6:30 a.m. I woke up at 9:30 to the baby screaming and winced and cried out at my shoulder. It's killing me. But for all the pain, exhaustion and crappiness I have on me like a stink today, I birthed out an idea that I think is going to be pretty cool.

Or maybe I'll spend the day talking myself out of it.

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