Saturday, August 19, 2006

I'm scared!

So, I went to see the Sorentinos tonight at the Mystic here in
Petaluma. It was great! Then, I decided not to stay for the other band
and opted to walk home, get some beer and catch up on the backlog of
movies/TV shows I've accumulated on my "Tivo (it's really comcast
DVR),. Anywho...

I roll over to the one 7-11 thats on my way home and some creepy, yet
gentlemanly dude holds the door for me. I thought it was nice of him
because I'm one of the few that really, honestly takes 5 seconds out
of his/her day to hold the door for people. Yet this guy watched me
cross the parking lot, waited for me to get there and was holding the
door the whole time. Admittedly, I am totally, totally PARANOID and
lately I question every persons motive (in my mind of course). But,
the dude abides. I get a sixer of coors light and a taquito and the
door holder is like, "shopping" but eyeing me like I was his childhood
basketball coach. And, I could be. I coached alot of kids. But 8 out
of 10 of them go "Heyyy....weren't you my basketball coach when I was
9???" This guy bought some chips, some smokes and a whole eyeful of
DLew.

I'm the guy behind the guy behind stalker and I buy my stuff, say
hello as always to the middle eastern guy behind the counter and on my
way I go. Sure enough, I look to head out...and that dude is holding
the door for me. He bought his stuff, watched another guy go out and
was holding the door for me. Whatta (freak) guy! Holding the door for
me with authority.

I had already thought it odd, but come on man. Waiting a
customer ahead to hold the door for me? Weird. So, I get wigged out
and say thanks and out I go. He's following me. Seriously. Going the
same way I am, looking at me...etc. I cross the street and watch.
Still there. Smoking. I then make a smart move. I decide that since
I'm coming up on the bus stop, I'll stop there and act like I'm
waiting for a bus. If he's truly following me, he'll sit down and wait
too. Right? RIGHT? So I do that. I duck in behind the bus stop and I
calmly look over and see him standing there, looking at me looking at
him...and he takes a drag off his cig and turns down a street that's
like, 1/2 a block. Nobody lives on it. Dude. NOBODY lives on that
street. Ugh.

I then kind of trot out and get way ahead of the distance I should be
if you're following me without really watching. I scoot over to a more
populated place where I know I can cut through a parking lot and get
home. I then stop and talk to my friend Jay who runs a bar in town. No
sign of Mr. Head-hunting-good-samaritan. Whew. Maybe you had to be
there, but it was fricking creepy. I was, and still am, freaked out
kinda. My wife isn't here and I'm all alone with a 6 pack of coors
light and 5 episodes of Venture Brothers cued up.

I'm closing with this: I will post something the SECOND I wake up. If
you're reading this and it's Sunday night and there's no new post, you
know what happened. Tell the dude at the 7-11 on the boulevard by the
movie theater to roll tape at about 9:45. I'll be the first murder
victim who told everyone what the hell happened!

p.s. The sorentinos rocked!

1 comment:

Thom said...

With that kind of build up you should have killed yourself just for the drama!

But then I wouldn't have gotten my birthday beer (thanks) and we wouldn't have come up with the hit that will make us a fortune!

But come on!!!!! How paranoid ARE you?

Nonetheless... the dude... indeed... abides.