Some good friends of ours had a nice, mellow Christmas party Saturday. Wait, it was a "holiday" party Mr. Bill O'Reilly. That's right beeotch! Anyway, I was doing some beer drinking and hanging out when I suddenly did the lamest party foul ever. Well....in a while at least.
A neighbor was borrowing some DVD's from our hosts and I asked to see them to give them my seal of approval. He handed them over and, rather than set down my bottle of beer (God forbid), I tucked it under my arm and began to look through the DVD's. One of them slipped out of the pile and fell on the floor next to the couch I was standing in front of. Without thinking twice, I bent over to pick it up....while the beer was still under my arm.
I'm about 6"4 and have quite the beer gut going so bending over and then standing back up takes me a solid 2-4 seconds...so that's how long the beer poured onto the couch for. When I stood up, I just kept looking at the DVD's until I felt that my leg was wet. Then the neighbor kind of went "ohhhh dude." I totally drenched the couch. I felt terrible...I still do. I apologized a bunch and they said that since they have a kid, the cushions are washable but still. What a jackass. I mean, I wasn't even all that drunk, it was just a bonehead move on my behalf.
So, if you plan on inviting me to your HOLIDAY party this year, get some plastic coverings for your furniture.