Friday, March 31, 2006

My new car, L.A., old people and Marsha Brady

I got a new car!!

It's a 2005 Honda Element and it's green. That pic is of the back of it so you can see the sweet WILCO sticker I put on it. That sticker was really the only reason I got the looks so cool. I had the sticker, it didn't like, come with the car. Anyway...I'm driving it down to L.A. to see five a.m. so if you see this and live in L.A. (or feel like making a last second road trip) come down!

This morning I had to go pick up some medication at Kaiser and a real pet peeve struck me that I've been meaning to write about. Old people. I love all my grandparents, I just don't like other peoples old people. Here's why...
Since I go to work a little later than most, I frequently go to the store or run errands at 10 or 11 a.m. If you ever go to a supermarket at that time, it's all old people. And drunks waiting to buy morning booze. But mostly old people. They're all sweet and everything, but they stand at the counter (or checkout stand) and just talk and talk and talk and talk and talk. Loudly. About really inappropriate stuff. Case in point, some old man was in the front of the line at Kaiser talking about his bowel disfunction for a solid five minutes. Come ON man, move along! I hate being there anyway and I really don't feel like waiting in a long ass line for you to give out too much info. It happens almost every time I go to the supermarket in the morning too. Either that, or (like yesterday morning) some old lady will count out $7.00 in change while at the counter.

I know it's mean to say, but I get impatient. The worst part is, I know my grandma does that stuff and more. She used to be on a first name basis with the baggers and checkers at Safeway. She'd bring them like...vegie-burgers she made and would tell them all about her family. Once I went to the store with her and all the checkers knew who I was. Yikes! I just wanted to air out one of my many grievances in regards to the old. Next time, why I think they should be forced to drive cars made of nerf.

And my ramblings...last night I had a dream I made out with Marsha Brady in the hedge maze from THE SHINING. In the dream I was at a party with my wife and some other people and somehow ended up in the hedge maze with her and she made a move. I distinctly remember saying "hey, hey! I'm married and my wife is like, right over there!" but then I went for it anyway. After some kissing and ass grabbing, I was next talking to a friend who said that was a dumb thing to do, what...with my wife nearby. Normally dreams are hazy, but I remember clearly saying "Dude, it was fucking Marsha Brady! C'mon!" Amen.

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